There's er...a party...in my pants?

<+JessaGaming> I am here...
<+JessaGaming> but not here!
<+JJ> Liar
<+JJ> Liar liar pants for hire.
<+JessaGaming> aww...JJ, my pants are only for you.
<+JessaGaming> ...to wear on your head.
<+JJ> ...What the hell else would I do with them?
<+JessaGaming> I'm not sure. Be creative?
<+JJ> There's a limit to "being creative" that conflicts with "being able to later give back pants"


<+Tseti> through I admit I am a pussy pic whore and will take them from anyone

Some of us are just made of (destructive) win.

<+JJ_> Some people in my group got Perfect Attendance awards today
<+JJ_> However, I went to Las Vegas and got drunk and gambled away my money
<+JJ_> I think I win.

<@Peepsy> !s
<@Peepsy> ....Really?
<+Gongala> Crash.
<+Tseti> Huh
<+Tseti> I crashed the server
<+Tseti> GO ME
* @Peepsy highfives.
* +JJ chops off Peepsy's fingers with a heavy duty piece of machinery
* +Tseti is the destroyer of servers, the maker of ping and the master of crashers

<+Tseti> ...Just me or do the germanic languages like to make little germanic language babies that then knock up or steal from one another?


<+Cold-Comfort> Nice tree.
<+JJ> That's what she said.

We're not always pervy - sometimes we're just mean. (Mostly pervy, though.)

<@Tact> Since I am a man, I have psychologically disabled the function of my tear ducts, making it impossible for me to actually cry, you see.
<+Jessa> Yes, I've heard some men do that. And being a woman, and therefore prone to vindictive behavior (or so I'm told) it makes me want to kick sand in your eyes for funsies.

<+PhoneyPeepsy> Orgy?
<+JJ_Workies> some words catch PEepsy's eyes
<+Jessa> ...that is getting quoted.
<+Gongala> If only we kept the conversation where you said, "I saw the word 'blowjob' and had to come back." Jessa.
<+Jessa> I KNOW
<+Jessa> ...I may have to scan my logs for that.
<+PhoneyPeepsy> I log all my chat
<+Gongala> Just search for blowjobs and see how often they come up.
<+JJ_Workies> All the time
<+Jessa> ...I'll be here all year looking for that.
<+Gongala> That could be oddly taken out of context.
<+JJ_Workies> That's not odd at all
<+JJ_Workies> I took it entirely in context to mean she's really bad at finding them.
<+Jessa> Apparently not, since that's what brought me back that day.
<+JJ_Workies> From death?
<+JJ_Workies> That is how we revive you?
<+Jessa> ...indeed.
<+JJ_Workies> Hrm.
<+JJ_Workies> I'll never look at my raise dead scrolls again
<+Jessa> ha!
<+Gongala> An odd racial ability.
<+PhoneyPeepsy> I am amazed my room didn't flop
<+Gongala> Character uses blowjob
<+JJ_Workies> That's what she said.
<+Gongala> Raise dead
<+Gongala> Praying animation
<+JJ_Workies> Don't suggest it
<+JJ_Workies> Someone will want it
<+Cold-Comfort> Talk about sexual healing.

<+TsetiIsAtClass> Yay
<+TsetiIsAtClass> ...Blow job?
<+JJ> ...Yes, in the middle of the Center.
<+Gongala> That sounds like Chelsea.
<+Gongala> ...
<+TsetiIsAtClass> HAND JOB!
<+Jessa> ...somebody say blowjob?
<+Spartan_> I like fey.
<+Jessa> >.>
<+Jessa> <.<
<+JJ> Someone did.
<+TsetiIsAtClass> Do they taste like sunshine and laughter?
<+JJ> No, she showed him the sun and the moon
<+Gongala> What about blow jobs?
<@Peepsy> What in the devil is this all about?
<+TsetiIsAtClass> Chelsea said she made Peppyr happy
<+TsetiIsAtClass> And I wondered if she meant a blowjob
<+Jessa> I don't know, I just saw "blowjob."
<+Jessa> IT CAUGHT MY ATTENTION.


<+PhoneyPeepsy> Gongala do you like me? []Yes []no
<+Gongala> [] graduated from middle school almost a decade ago

Stop Wanking and Save a Kitten

<@JJ> Kitty on my lap
<@JJ> What did I do before I got a little fuzzy friend?
<@Peepsy> Alot of masturbation.
<@JJ> That seems inaccurate


<+Cold-Comfort> ..it's probably indicative of something that *all* of the quotes are about sex.
* +Chimaera|Working just noticed that
<+Jessa> I'm waiting for one that isn't, but it has not yet happened!
<+Jessa> I have one I'm holding in reserve for when there are more to post with it...AND EVEN IT MENTIONS MASTURBATION
<+Jessa> AND KITTIES
<+Jessa> WHICH IS DISTURBING
<+Cold-Comfort> Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten.
<+Jessa> No.
<+Jessa> But I've heard that.
<+Cold-Comfort> If you're spanking the monkey to lesbian cyber, two.
<+Jessa> ...quoting that.

They don't teach this stuff in sex ed

<@JJ> True, but if people were encouraged to explore themselves and fire things out, they might be less...Well, like my ex
<@JJ> The one I told you about, with the shirt ripping off and the shouting about waiting until marriage
<+FDTR> lol
<+FDTR> waiting until marriage
<+FDTR> hello pointless traditions
<@JJ> No, this was really fucking weird
<+Jessa> Yeah.
<@JJ> She straddled me, pushed me down, pulled off her shirt
<@JJ> And told me she wanted to wait until marraige
<@JJ> Leaving me just...entirely confused as to what was going on, then.
<@Peepsy> And errect.
<+FDTR> ... loool.
<@JJ> No, that's a boner-killer if ever there was one.
<+FDTR> I suspect she was trying to piss you off.
<@JJ> It didn't even piss me off. It just confused the hell out of me
<@JJ> I think I made gibbering protest sounds because my brain was refusing to parse the visual and the tactile with the audio
<+FDTR> Hm
<+FDTR> Grr
<+FDTR> I can't download a cracked .exe for a game, and I can't find my disk
<+FDTR> sad
<@JJ> It's like me leaping in your face while eating spaghetti rather loudly, and shouting at you that I was hungry and had no food
<+FDTR> With a rake?
<@JJ> Of course.
<@JJ> I'm riding the rake, in fact
<+FDTR> Rakes make everything better.
<+FDTR> Everything.
<@JJ> Especially sex
<+FDTR> Totally.
<+FDTR> I mean, she pulls a rake out, it becomes amazing sex.
<@JJ> Even better if you both pull a rake out. I did that once, and woke up four months later in an alleyway, missing my kidneys. Must have been one hell of an orgasm.
<+FDTR> Imagine if everybody pulled a rake out at an orgy.
<+FDTR> They'd achieve enlightenment and punch Christ in the face simultaneously.
<@JJ> I think the aftershock would level Tokyo
<+FDTR> If not the entire region of Asia.
<@JJ> Mass panic, widespread destruction
<@JJ> They'd have to abolish the Rictor scale in favor of the Raketor scale.
<@JJ> Just to measure it.

Creative Solutions

<@JJ> Actually, fuck my socks
<@JJ> I don't like these ones anymore
<+Meredia> I lack the anatomy to do so.
<+Gongala> If you try, anything is possible.
<+Gongala> Don't be limited by anatomy.
<+Jessa> ...there are ways around everything. Some of them are plastic. Others are silicone.
<+Jessa> ...anyway.
<+Jessa> I'm going to go play.
<@JJ> Old school wood.
<+Gongala> Wood is bad.
<+Jessa> I've heard glass is interesting.
<@JJ> It is.
<@JJ> It's why it's old-school
<+Gongala> Glass is interesting.
<@JJ> So I've heard.
<+Jessa> ...I just can't seem to imagine boning myslf with Pyrex, though.
<+Jessa> (this seems like something Tseti should have said.)

Oh, the things I could say...

<+JJ_> You know what's really complicated?
<@Tact> Popsicles?
<+JJ_> Calculus. To a blind person.
<+Jessa> ...I just ate a popsicle.
<+Gongala> You ate complications.
<+Jessa> Calculus is complicated to me, and I see alright...with my glasses.
<+Jessa> I did.
<+Jessa> It was a pretty big popsicle.
<@Tact> I don't see how calculus would be complicated to a blind person specifically.
<+Gongala> I want to say so many things, Jessa.


<+PhoneyPeepsy> Do you watch porn in class?
<+Tseti> Nah, this is a video on how to have better sex
* JJ (JJ@dm-36458.pitbpa.fios.verizon.net) has joined #cormyrdales
<+Tseti> If it was porn, it'll suck ass
* ChanServ sets mode: +v JJ
<+Tseti> ...And not in a kinky porn way
<+JJ> Again, I enter on the best sentence ever


<+Spartan_> JJ!
<+Spartan_> I think... I should stop following this chatroom.
<+JJ> Sparta Mart.
<+Spartan_> Is NSFW
<+Jessa> aw, but Spartan!
* +Jessa sniffs
<+Spartan_> What is yo opinion?
<+Jessa> Don't you <3 me anymore?
<+Tseti> We'll use euphemisms
<+Spartan_> Aww, Jessa!
<+Spartan_> I do <3 you.
<+Jessa> Yay!
<+Tseti> Okay, so she's uh...Touching his magical unicorn